I tend to believe I lead a very good life. I have been through the ringer with life changing experience that it has taught me to look at new ones in a new light. Unfortunately the people my age and even older have not experienced the things I have, and those that have are very few and far between. It is hard for me to have common ground with allot of ladies around here but the ones I have met and have been wonderful to me are just awesome! Don't get me wrong, I have met a few that I thought were cool, but two three weeks down the road its "what can you do for me" type of friendship, and honestly I am not down for that. I feel like here lately I am being walked on. I have weeded out the bad and dealing with some of the ones in perspective. My down fall is I am too nice. Now when you are looking at me I know you are probably thinking, tattoos and piercings...no way! Well that's what you get for being stereotypical. I can be mean but if we develop a friendship it is allot harder to tell you how I feel in fear of hurting your feelings. So it just fumes and fumes until one day I explode! I know that's not a healthy way of doing things but I am working on it. After all I have to think of my family and that we come first. I would give my last dollar to the right cause, and sometimes that gets me in trouble! I am learning to deal with that as well. I just get all wound up with trying to make things perfect ( I'm OCD) it's in my nature, that I get carried away and it ends up biting me in the ass later! Over the past few weeks I have learned that I will meet people that just want to be friends with me for money, or to use me, and then there are those real friends that stick by you and are there for you when you are down. Like I said they are very few and far in between but they do exist! When you live in a world where you move at the drop of a dime, and have to make friends in different states as you handle and juggle all the stresses of the military you get good at it. You develop this kind of 6 Th sense that most people don't have. You gain the ability to see people for what they are without having to hang around long enough to get screwed! I have learned allot of things being a military wife and I wouldn't change it. Hell I probably know more regs then people in the actual military :) Sad because I have had to look them up from experience but I will fight for my family and for my friends! It just struck me as odd that there are not that many honest people left in the world today. I don't know if it is because the lack of morals they were brought up with or that they just don't care. All I can say is Karma! I am happy I am raising my children with standards and morals and that I have every bit of confidence that they will grow up to be respectable adults when entering the "real" world!
I know I have been ranting for a while, just some things to ponder I guess, that's what blogs are for right?
On the upside my husband and I are doing great! He keeps me strong everyday. Sure we have our ups and downs but all together we have develops a bond like no other. We have been through tough times and I can honestly say it has brought me closer to my man. I have full trust for him and would do anything for him. Its so rare that you see couples that start out from nothing, and have people creating drama striving for you not to be together, and end up as happy as we are!
I remember when I was a single mother of two kids driving a beat up Saturn working almost 7 days a week as a security officer just so that I could cover rent and food. In Hawai'i no less! Its been 5 years since my hero found me and swept me off my feet. Now I live in a home with lots of great things that make a house a home, family pictures, a full fridge, and a comfy bed. I am driving an nice truck and I appreciate everyday what I have! I know what its like to have nothing. It baffles me to see women complain of how rough they have it while driving their nice car, and living in a paid for house, and then turning around and cheating on the same person who provided all of it. Baffles me really! They don't know what rough is! Or when I hear some 21 year old guy detesting a baby and saying he isn't ready and that he is sure it isn't his even though he has paternity papers. I was 16 when I got pregnant and raised my son alone. No child support from the dad, he wasn't ready either. I told him to embrace the life he was given and take care of his child, that tomorrow could be his last day, and if he wanted to leave this world as a dead beat. He came in the bar the other day to show me pictures of his kid :) He is an active dad now. People down bartenders even though we do give some insightful advice! Well some of us anyway..lol. Ok I think I am done rambling off any little thing that comes to mind..lol sorry had a rough day today...can you tell?
